Almost two weeks ago my boyfriend proposed to me. I am a citizen of the United States and he is a Swiss citizen. Our wedding will have to happen in the next couple months if we want to remain in the same country together. We do not want to be separated again and are both looking forward to our union. We plan to have just a small wedding with his family here in Switzerland, just the legal ceremony and a dinner party following. We plan one day to be able to share our marriage with my family in Wisconsin, I really want them to be a part of it. Since we are planning a small celebration I didn't think it was necessary to wear an extravegant gown. I was considering something light blue and lacy, with off the shoulder cap sleeves. I didn't necessarily see myself in a white wedding dress or at least I was trying to convince myself that I didn't want or need to wear one. I thought I was going to the bridal gown shop well prepared to search for a cocktail dress.
Yesterday, my fiancé Beni and his mother accompanied me to the dress shop. I walked in excited and certain I would find something I liked. As the woman came to greet us she spoke in german, I am the only one who cannot speak german. Beni explains I only speak english so the woman does the best she can to communicate with me in english. I am always grateful when people here try to accomodate me and speak my language, and sometimes it can get frustrating to have such a barrier. I explain to her what I am looking for and she directs me towards the bridesmaids gowns. All of these dresses have far too much material and are not at all like the picture I have in my mind. I am not certain she understands the details I explain. Beni suggests maybe looking at the white simple gowns, we make our towards the bridal gowns. As I am walking, a dress on a mannequin catches my eyes. It is beautifully simple and absolutely unique in this store. Long laced sleeves with flower details grace the sides of this vintage 70's looking gown. It is not too extravegant, it's quite elegant, and just like when I first saw my fiancé I thought there was no way this could be mine. I do not say anything about this gown and I walk towards the large selection of some bride's dream dresses. I comb through them and there is absolutely nothing I am interested in. I try one on just to please the woman trying to help me.
Kathi and Me
It is not my style, so Beni's mother suggests we look at short dresses. Beni's mother Kathi is a beautiful woman, she always tries her best to speak english with me and is the perfect mother. She is caring and kind, and since the day I arrived has made sure I feel comfortable here in Switzerland. She's given me many of her clothes because I didn't have enough and she takes me to german lessons once a week. All of my fiancés family is very loving and accepting of me. I know that I am extremely blessed with my future husband and in laws. I walk over towards the rack housing the short wedding dresses, while Beni's mom and the woman try to show me some. They are both speaking in german, none of these dresses are what I had in mind, and my head is starting to spin. Just as I start to feel a little frustrated, panicked, and unsure how I am going to find a dress, Beni grabs my hand from behind and says, "Come with me darling." As the two woman continue their efforts I walk with Beni towards that dress that had called to me when we first walked by it. I love this dress but am afraid it is too much for our celebration, Beni assures me that this dress is perfect and that I should try it on.
I read that the dress is in my size even though it looks very petite on the mannequin. We ask the woman to try it on and she assures me that it is too small and to order my size would take a few months, I am almost disheartened. I take it in the fitting room and start to slip it on, the woman is helping but still convinced it isn't my size. I fit my arms through and pull it up, it fits perfectly, I knew it would. She gives me simple heels to wear with it and I walk out of the room in front of the big mirror. Beni stands when he sees me and gives me that dimple surrounded grin. God he is handsome. He tells me he loves it and that it reminds him of fairies, which if you know me you would understand. The three of them speak in German together and I have no idea what is being said. Does Kathi like it? Is it too much for our ceremony? Does it look terrible on me? At this point I feel sadness that my own mother and sisters aren't here to give me advice. I do not feel confident so I try on the short dresses the women have chosen for me. They are all beautiful but I don't feel that they are me. My fairy dress sticks in my mind but I don't know what they think so I suggest maybe we can keep looking and think about it. I am surprised when Beni's mother suggests I put the vintage dress back on, and I slide easily back in to it. She tells me how she had spotted this one too when we first walked in and if it's mine then it's mine. She is very sweet and I know she wants to make sure I am comfortable and happy with my decisions. I feel relief and excitement. I am overwhelmed with the joy that I have found my very own wedding dress.
To read the full story on how Beni and I met click Here
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